So i'm off to gucci and prada land

My first long trip away as a mother. I wonder how I'll cope. Already this morning, I was hugging and kissing Jarrett like a mad mama and I have not even started towards Changi airport yet. Duh...

Motherhood really changes one's perspective. Pre/post marriage, I wouldn't have hesitated to go on a trip, long or short. The moment my boss says "Wanna go.." I was already lugging my luggage out of the storeroom. It's not that son is more important than bf/hubby, but you know hubby's a grown man and he can take care of himself. The most is I'll wonder what he's up to and of cos miss him like hell. But a baby...that's different. A baby's so dependent, so helpless!

Another worry...the boobs! Sorry if I sound cruel, but travelling as a nursing mummy can really be a pain! Did a short trip last month and boy was it stressful. Looking for nursing rooms, failing which, washrooms which is not a really nice place, seriously... especially when you have people banging on the door. Having your travelling companion/business aq waiting for you, lugging the pump everywhere you go, engorgement...argh...
This time round, I'm bringing both my electrical and manual. KS? YES! But vs painful boobs and the fear that I'll come back a dry cow, I'll willingly lug them around. Got my shawl ready and this time I'll have to express in public. Nursing rooms are almost unheard of in Italy (based on my research/travel forums) and public toilets are not easily available..maybe I need to bring a potty too! hahaha....anyway, breastfeeding for half a year, one will get used to the idea that the boobs are no longer personal assets.

2 weeks later. ciao!

Overheard between father and son

Wx: Jarrett.....you will be a gor gor (big brother) next time. If u have a little sis, she will be called Cheyenne...u noe

Jarrett: eh...eh...(baby talk)

Wx: If you have a di di (younger bro), he'll be called Nathanial. You must be a good example ok. Teach your sis/bro to be good.

Jarrett: eh eh....eh....

in case you are wondering, no..I am not pregnant with no. 2 but the mr. has been talking about it, and so are both our parents! hello.......

my brief stint as a SAHM

The in laws were away on a holiday and so were my parents. At exactly the same time, so my initial plan of bringing the baby to work was dashed. If grandma's not around, mummy cannot get any work done with little Jarrett in the office. So next best plan? Work from home.

6 days with the baby and hubby at home was.......blissful. Really! Taking care of Jarrett, making lunches/dinners, playing with baby, going out for dinners knowing there's no need to go into the office the next day...I certainly can get used to this. Of course I did some work from home. To be honest, not as much as I would in the office but I certainly did what was necessary and important. boss...if u are reading this, know that I did the budgeting and planning.
this is what we wake up to on some mornings..

We call this "Jarrett's ostrich game"

Cool dude

minus the bib of cos!

the thing with over enthusiastic grandparents

Once the grandparents heard Jarrett's starting on solid, they couldn't wait to start giving him treats. Last Sun, we all went out for dinner to celebrate my niece 15th birthday. Boy was it a stressful night for Wx. We ended the meal with a really cute watermelon cake (tasted and looked like one). Now, before the cake, the grandparents had been cooing over the baby and kept saying Jarrett's a big boy now, and should be given bits of food to try. Hello!!! Little Jarrett is only 5.5 months old! To which, my Mum very proudly insisted I was fed with porridge at 3mths! Horrors!!! No wonder I grew up a fat kid! My stomach probably never had enough time to mature before it was stuffed with food and it was all left in there to rot! And when I asked her when I should introduce meat, she said "Don't know. When you wanted to eat, I just fed you" Argh...and was told I went on to rice when I was 9mths old. Let's just say I am glad I am the one in charge of Jarrett's diet now. Oh ya..my dad also very proudly claimed he introduced me to my 1st sip of beer when i was in my toddlerage, which probably explained why I love my drinks..but strangly not beer and probably why I didn't end up in Harvard cos I lost some major IQ points there.

Ok, side track too much, back to the cake. So the birthday song was sang (3x) and the cake was distributed. This was when the stress started. My dad started saying Jarrett should be given a taste of it since the little fellow had been "licking" his lips the whole night and sticking out his tongue whenever he saw the adults eating. I, of course said no. My sister kept quiet but kept giving me the look. I'm guessing it was the "oh o...." look. Then my mum chipped in and said a little wouldn't harm and it would be fun for the baby to try. I again said no and explained very patiently that Jarrett's not ready for butter, cream, sugar and food colouring! He had only started on rice cereal and pumpkin thus far. My dad picked up his fork and dug out a small piece of cake and proceeded to shove it into Jarrett's face! Ok, it was war time! I yelled no, covered Jarrett's mouth and shot my dad murderous looks. Poor Wx was just caught in the middle, cause Jarrett was seated on his lap while me and my dad went on a tug of war. Lucky for him, Jarrett was due for a feed, so we packed up and left before the others did.

I'm not surprise if I'm named the "VERY DIFFICULT MUM" now. Yes, I'm fussy but I'm not sorry about it. I'm just being the mother hen, taking care of my little one. I'm also not saying my mum did a lousy job taking care of me, cos she certainly brought me up well. It's just that time has changed, and with it brought new knowledge and methods of parenting. With my family history of allergies, I have to be more diligent than the other mummies. So folks, sorry if I had offended you, I'm sure I loved your porridge when I was 3months old and I now know why I can hold my drinks so well!

Baby Jarrett's 1st cereal

At 5mths day 2, Jarrett got his 1st taste of rice cereal. I would have preferred to wait till he's 6mths old, but I need to get him ready for solids in case he doesn't take to frozen breastmilk when I'm away. Anyway, don't think the little fellow will have problems eating solid, he gulped down his cereal in no time and was screaming for more.

Baby Jarrett Meets Baby Aidan Monster

Chic babies meet at the Marmalade Pantry for Sunday Brunch..of cos all they had were breastmilk...maybe that was why they didn't look too excited....and looked a tad disgruntled too, I think....

lazy afternnon at Coffeebean

The little one had lots of fun at coffeebean last Sun. All everyone heard at the little, cozy outlet was Jarrett's screams of laughter. And dun yell at me, I swear I had a decaf.

I left my brain at home this morning

I have been trying really hard to get to the office earlier, so I can squeeze in more work. But it all back fired this morning. Woke up at 6.45am to nurse Jarrett and thought I could start preparing for work right after tucking him back to bed. Wrong....I fell back in bed myself and didnt' wake up till 8.30am. Still alright I thought. On the way to the office, I stopped at Caltex to fill up the tank....only to realise I LEFT MY WALLET AND PHONE at home! Too late to drive off as the aunty had already started the pump! Argh...............panic panic.........went into the station hoping to borrow a phone to call SOS but staff said phone is strictly for staff only and for work! Darn!

I think I must have looked darn desperate cos the aunty in Old Chang Kee (right in the station, yum yum) took pity on me and offered me her personal HP. So sweet of her. I am so going back tomorrow and buying lots and lots of curry puff from her!

My colleague Jack was depatched as the SOS guy! 10 mins later, petrol paid and I rushed off in my blue wheels! So I didn't turn up at work earlier, and got into more trouble instead. Sigh......the brain's not working too well I tell you and I heard it's a common problem shared among all mummies.

Someone sexy's waiting for me in bed

Breastmilk cheap?

I have been stuffing myself with food since baby was born. I kid you not when I say I am eating more than Wx now "GASP"! And for people who know how much Wx can eat, it's scary isn't it? The amount I am eating.

I do not eat huge servings (thou the servings are definitly bigger than what I used to eat) at one go, but I am constantly snacking along the day, right up to before I hit the bed. Sometimes I even grab a snack when I wake up at 3am to express milk. It has reached a point where even my bro-in-law couldn't help but made a remark on it. Wx has been quite concern too and put it very "nicely" that maybe I shouldn't be eating so much.
Well, honestly, I think it's terrifying too but I really cannot help it! I am constantly hungry! If I don't prepare snacks for work, I'll be going round looking for (others) food. I'm like the starving dog in the office. My energy level will also dip all the way down. No food, no energy.
My sis has taken pity on me and has been bringing me snacks (so sweet of her.. infact, she has been doing so since I got pregnant). My mum always let me have the first pick whenever she brings snacks over, which also means I get to have double servings!
I used to share my food with Wx, half of it would go to him. These days, he's lucky if he gets a taste of what I am eating! If I share, I'll end up telling him "Know what? My tummy feels empty" and I am the one who has to keep hinting for supper. The poor dear simply can't keep up with me.

So people who think breastfeeding is cheap, think again. Wx will have to rob the bank soon to feed me, and with my investments in 2 electrical pumps, 1 manual pump, over 2 dozens of milk bottles, hundreds of milk bags and tonics, I really don't think there's much savings at all. Infact, I think we may be spending more. Now..don't get me started on why THEN I want to breastfeed. Seriously...

Botak Jarrett

After months of "fighting" with the Mr., I finally gave in and shaved Jarrett botak.

BeforeThis was why we had to shave him. The Grandma screamed murder the moment I causally brought up the subject of shaving but as one can see, Jarrett has been "plucking" himself bald for weeks! The moment he managed the gripe, he had been pulling out his hair. So to save him the trouble and the pain...I gave in and we shaved him (DIY) 2 Sats ago. All done at home, with a Philips hair shaver. Took us quite a while as the little one got very frustrated and angry. We nearly gave up and wanted to run off to the hairdresser, with half a shaven head. Haha..but decided to try my hand at it and managed to finish the job. So half done by daddy and half done by mummy. We are darn proud of ourselves! Not very easy ok, with a screaming baby, plus with each shave, my heart was bleeding. I really like his hair! If he had not been pulling out his mop of hair, I wouldn't have agreed to shave it all off.

After. Freshly shaven! My Botak Jarrett.
Turned out lots of people like it, they have been cooing over him since then.

Brunch at Mimolette

Very serious about food

still prefers milk....

First trip to Botanic Garden & Grandpa's Birthday dinner

Jarrett's first trip to the Botanic Garden and he was a big hit with the babes.

Grandpa's little darling. Cousin's little cutie.

Lucky Jarrett!

This came in the mail last week, all the way from London.
Mummy's the birthday girl but Jarrett got the present. He's one lucky kid, showered with lots of love from all corners of the world!

Baby Jarrett: Thank you Aunty Tricia! I love the book, I've got "That's Not My Puppy". Looks like my mummy and Tyler shares the same taste when it comes to books!" LOL

and a few of daddy's fav pics

I know this is an old joke..but i really can't resist posting this

We weren't kidding when we said Jarrett loves being Superman.

Wx's getting kick out of the room.

No..we didn't have a lovers' quarrel but Wx is under quarantine. The old man has got the cough since yesterday and in our household, when one of us gets sick, he/she gets boot out of the room! Sorry dear, u are either sleeping on the couch or the guest room tonight. With the baby around, we have to be more careful now. Instead of just sleeping apart, we have also enforced the rule of wearing a mask and washing our hands before we touch Jarrett. Contact with the little one is to be kept to a minimal. So it's the case of "Can see but cannot touch".

Why so fussy? Cos......
1) If the little one gets sick, he will not be able to tell us what's wrong with him, so he'll resort to his only way = cry

2) If we do not know he's crying because he's not feeling well, it will result in a lot of irritation and anger and we may mistaken it as him being cranky and which.... may further result in more irritation which.... may lead to us scolding him for the wrong reasons.

3) As parents, we all hate the feeling of helplessness when it comes to our children. It's not a nice feeling knowing that your baby is not feeling well and because he can't tell you what to do, you don't really know what to do to make him more comfortable. I know of some mummies who break down when their little ones fall ill.

4) Heartache. Please see above point 3. U ever see a baby cry till his face's red, tears all over his face and you don't know what to do?

5) I don't mean to say small = weak, but if you are able to prevent a little one from falling sick, shouldn't u do it?

So Daddy's off duty for the next few days, till he gets well. If U read my earlier post, you'll know I am in deep shit cos I'm exhausted. Of course I love to take care of Jarrett, he's my precious little meatball...but I really appreciate having Wx around. He's been great with the baby whereas I am more like an apprentice. So if u call me anytime these few days and if I sound flustered, u know why.

Exhaustion has done me in..

I'm a bad mummy. I did the unthinkable yesterday. I hit my baby "wail.....................". In case you are thinking, no..i didn't bash him against the wall or kick him in the head...it was a tap on his hand but I am dying from shame and eaten by guilt ever since. How could I hit my precious little meatball??? I am a monster!!! The father has been shaking his head at me which adds on to my guilt.

What made me snapped was exhaustion. I have been trying to be a supermom, and boy, it's not easy. Having to juggle a career with motherhood and being a wife is no joke. After a long day in the office, I return home each day, eager to spend some time with my son, but along the way, there are endless chores to be done. There were a few times where I felt like I was going to black out. I know I should take it easy and probably leave the baby with my in laws who are all too eager to take up the duty of babysitting overnite but I want to spend time with my baby too. 24hrs are no longer enough, I feel like I am racing against time and at times I feel like my heart is going to pop out from my chest as I run from one place to the next. I even feel like sleeping when I am behind the wheels.

So on Sunday when the little one just wouldn't calm down and stopped crying, coupled with my super duper low tolerance level whenever I am very tired, I snapped and hit him on his hand. I am not feeling very proud now. Exhaustion is not an excuse. Mummy's sorry Baby Jarrett.
I now understand the saying "when a parent beats a child, it's the parent who will hurt more".